5. Practical Boundaries: energy vampires and energetic protection
The topic of boundaries is very important to all empaths, who tend to face challenges in developing healthy relationship structures due to their accommodating personalities. You may choose not to prioritize your own needs in the hopes of pleasing another person or out of fear that you will upset them if you assert your desires in a situation.
This can stem from an underlying concern that they won’t like you or that the people in your life will disapprove of you. As a sensitive soul, this can be very hard on you and in order to avoid these unpleasant feelings, it leads to people-pleasing tendencies and poor boundaries. However, there are ways you can manage this experience, which will be discussed in this section.
Some people in your life could be described as having energy vampire-like behaviors. They end up taking your energy and are unable to give in return, or the relationship is energetically non-mutual. This can leave you vulnerable to being taken advantage of as energy-vampire people are often starved for affection, love, and care and you like to give these things to others.
Keep in mind though, that it is not your sole responsibility to fulfill the needs of those around you or individuals who are toxic, harmful, or abusive towards you—or just individuals who you choose not to engage with just because you don’t want to.
Boundaries are a good way to ensure that you are also getting what you need out of a relationship, job situation, and the like. Setting boundaries provides you with more self-empowerment and can help you overcome feelings of fear, guilt, and shame that you might feel when you assert yourself or express your needs and opinions.
Protecting yourself from toxic energies is important in order for you to maintain your personal power, sovereignty, and sense of self. It is recommended to have systems in place that can help you manage your boundaries and energetic self-protection.
Here are some suggestions for managing boundaries:
1. Steps to honor your true feelings
Honoring your experience can take practice for the Mystic Empath. Your accommodating nature often leads you to go to extraordinary measures to support someone else, which can be at the expense of your own needs and desires.
By remaining true to your feelings and knowing what those feelings are moment-to-moment, you stand a better chance at navigating experiences with you in your center. Even if at times it is alright to be selfless and see things from other people’s point of view, it is also important to be mindful of toxic relationship dynamics that could or have developed.
- Check in with yourself, so you know what you are feeling outside of another person’s emotions.
- Clarify and define your experience in words to the other person.
- Use “I” statements over “you” statements when making your point.
- Avoid blaming yourself or apologizing profusely for stating your desires, needs, feelings, etc.
- Remain firm once you have decided how you feel and how you want to proceed in a given situation. Whereas a degree of flexibility can be useful, caving in to another person’s demands can leave you feeling bewildered and taken advantage of.
- Spend a few minutes alone to consider just your feelings and yours alone.
2. Develop a variety of personas
Everyone has different masks that they put on for a variety of reasons. In a way, any persona you muster or are using, is a version of you, even if it is not your most dominant self. Consider having a variety of personas or masks that you put on to confront situations. Like putting on a coat, you are dressing for the emotional weather.
If it is going to be a day when you need a lot of strength to confront difficult people, imagine that you are layering yourself in all the energies and character traits that allow you access to any side of yourself that you might need. If you have to be more fluid in your personality for an event or self-expressive, consider how you can cloak yourself in the traits that let these parts of yourself shine. You can always change it up, alter perceptions, and get creative with your personas.
3. Be more selective
You see past people’s external selves and see straight into their pure spirit. You tend to hold deep compassion for others and are highly sensitive to the fact that everyone has been through things. In your heart, you know that a person’s story often has a lot to do with how they behave. With this in mind, though, you sometimes shower people with so much graciousness that you let toxic people get too close to you.
You let people in, even those that have no business being a part of your inner circle. Be more selective in who gets access to these sides of yourself. Be choosy. It is okay to love people from afar. As an empath, you have to protect yourself from those that don’t deserve to know all of you. Your energy is precious and not everyone needs to be a full recipient of it.
4. Learn about different attachment styles
As someone who appreciates research, facts, and data, information on attachment theory and the different styles might be of use to you. There are four main types of relationship attachment styles. Understanding which types of attachments you are drawn to, the psychological effects of these types of dynamics, and what they mean can all lend you incredible amounts of insight into your relationships.
They can be applied to any of your connections—including with lovers, colleagues, friends, and family members. Armed with this knowledge, you can then gain a clearer picture of why things are playing out the way they are, especially if you are in a toxic relationship with a narcissistic, toxic, or manipulative person.
6. Practical Ideas for grounding and managing stress and anxiety
Your daily emotional experience might be accompanied by frayed nerves or a sensation that you are being submerged in nervous excitement. Grounding exercises can help you get through patches of anxiety and stress. The concept of grounding involves bringing your awareness back into the present moment, moving through emotions, and centering yourself in your physical body.
The Mystic Empath needs to ground into the energetic signature of the planet. Your expansive spiritual mindset can leave you feeling separate from your body. When you feel distant from physical reality, you find yourself feeling untethered from the here and now, and maybe even find it hard to focus on the things you want to be devoting your energy to.
In addition, your emotional processing often leaves you quite drained by the end of the day. A lot of life force goes to deciphering your boundaries from others. You might go to the store feeling fine and then return home in a poor mood. Your boundaries are naturally porous and easily allow in the unseen psychic emotions of others. This can lead to a sense of impending doom, anxiety, stress, or tension from others in addition to any of these feelings you have on your own accord.
Learning how to process when you are absorbing emotions from others is an important piece of managing your sensitivity. Consistent grounding techniques and setting up energetical and actual boundaries are ways in which you can protect yourself from the daily bombardment of emotional runoff that exists in your surroundings.
Here are some grounding methods to be aware of for your specific archetype:
The Mystic Empath likes their routines. This is one way you stay present, by knowing what you can anticipate. Find a sense of boundaries by rooting into a daily routine. Create positive habits around the things that you want to accomplish and do on a regular basis. Set goals and find a way to make a little space each week towards those intentions. When you have things you are working towards and a set idea of how you will get there, then you have a better chance at staying grounded in your body, mind, and spirit.
Breathwork is a form of patterned breathing that can be practiced for well-being, clarity, stress reduction, and more. Slowing and controlling your breathing can help support reducing blood pressure if you are feeling high-strung. It can also ease anxiety by helping you move your energy around through your breathing.
There is also a highly spiritual element to breathwork if you choose to engage with it in this way; shifting into deeper or altered states of consciousness. You can use these techniques to connect with the spirit of the Earth and help you link in with the webs of consciousness that make up the planet. This brings you into a greater sense of alignment with your own physical body and purpose in your human experience, along with an overall attitude of peace.
3. Meals and nutrition
One of the best ways for you to ground is to ensure you are eating dense and/or regular meals. Comfort foods help center you. They reduce your anxiety and give you a sense of weightedness that allows your emotions a place to settle. Consider paying more attention to when your moods shift, or you get cranky and if this may be related to your diet.